Everybody knows that people aren’t perfect. And we can agree quickly on this truth until the imperfections of others affect us. One of the most painful life lessons for me was the shortcomings of my parents.
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What I wanted from them collided with who they were. What I did not understand is that their inability to change and no mentors to guide them, they were as hopeless as I was. The irony is that I expected them to be good people when I was not one myself.
I should have pitied them rather than giving them my anger, but self-absorbed individuals rarely have compassion toward others. It wasn’t until my early twenties before I slowed down long enough to think about why I was so angry with them. There were four primary tensions:
- Life was happening too fast for an angry, immature teen to process.
- My parents were faithful to their Adamic natures.
- The noise inside of me was too loud for me to think clearly.
- My goal was not about changing, but leaving home.
Leaving home did not leave my problems behind. A friend told me that “my attitude would affect my altitude.” Though it was bumper sticker-ish, it is true. If you keep looking outward as though your problems are because of others, you will be incarcerated by your bitterness.
Time to Reflect
- Are you asking your parents to be something you refuse to be?
- How is your example presenting Christ to your parents?